6.10 The Package

Random thoughts. I thoroughly enjoy doing these writeups/recaps/rants following an episode that is fun, interesting, entertaining, worth rewatching several times. I can’t begin to explain how disappointed I was in this episode; I could barely get through it twice. Of course, it was the follow up to the epic Richard episode, so I went in with the lowest of expectations, and this cesspool of a suckfest didn’t come close to meeting that limbo stick. Yet another lollygagging waste of our time. I am done with any and all preview announcement or next week on LOST clips on Tuesday morning. I need a completely blank slate. As far as I’m concerned, this show ended with Juliet smashing the bomb at the bottom of the Swan shaft. I have to try to ignore this Season 6 like I try to do with the last seasons of Alias and X Files, episodes tacked onto the back of a cannon of overall goodness which does nothing but besmirch all the positiveness of the overall work. Many, many people want to simply give lip service and proclaim all is well, the show is as magnificent as ever. At the same time, I pledge to continue to tilt at windmills, fighting the unwinnable arguments. Jack is the most despicable character in TV history. I get physically ill when he opens his Forrest Gump mouth. I found a tomater. Derrrr. Life is like a box of tomaters. You never know when your wife is gonna die of AIDS. If Jack is to be the protector of the island and the world, I strongly recommend that the world cease to exist. I cannot live with the thought that Jack is some kind of savior. I have such a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach about the ending of this show. And let’s not forget that we have a scant handful of episodes remaining, and not much to show for it. Remember the hectic pace of Seasons 4 and 5, as is kept ratcheting up and up until spectacular volcanic season finales. Well, that makes two of us, because the LOST people sure don’t. Fock. This isn’t exactly going to be insightful or fun this week, ladies and gentlemen. Hey, I could spend hours making light of Widmore’s package, a playful use of words to describe old man balls. What’s the point? Higher expectations lead to greater results. Or it used to be like that. On with my weekly horsesh!!t. On yeah, no more LOST on replay on our cable system. Instead, I get to rewatch it on ABC on the internets while the stream freezes a couple of dozen times as I continue to tilt at computer virus windmills. For I am the Man of La Mensa. And Jack is the Man of La MushForBrains. Our brand new poll of Top 5 Worst Characters on LOST. Or inverse rank of intelligence. Either way.
5. Jacob
4. Sun
3. Kate
2. Old Stubborn Tomato
1. Jack.

Someone is using night vision goggles to spy on MIB’s camp, instead of a woman’s locker room. Let me be more specific. A woman’s locker room that is not affiliated with the WNBA in any way whatsoever. Yucky. So, the Widmorites have invaded LOST island. But, hasn’t MIB been pretty perceptive in nearly immediately greeting visitors to the island. He showed up fairly quickly to greet the Losties day one, the French people day one, and the Black Rock day one. Are you telling me he didn’t know the Widmorites were hanging around, watching him? Weak. Kate and Sawyer are sharing some cocoa. At least they’ve relegated Kate to a non persona. Truly, a silver lining in a bank of thunderheads. Jin is re-bandaging his leg, although MIB seems to think the air will do it some good. Some medicine might help, but I’m not a doctor. Again, I keep going back to the same point, how exactly do people heal quicker on the island. It’s not MIB or Jacob doing it, for the most part. Sawyer shared the cave information with Jin. MIB reemphasizes to us the viewer for the 17th time that he has no idea if the uncrossed off candidate name Kwon means Jin or Sun. Frankly, we just don’t care anymore. So, MIB claims that his master plan is to gather all the remaining candidates and leave the island with them. I suppose it makes some sense, in that there can be no replacement for Jacob if MIB wants to carry out whatever plan he has that he HASN’T shared with us. Another week, another episode without learning MIB’s name. I’m losing interest in that too. Jin’s money at the airport didn’t clear customs.
From 6.6 Sundown
Also, take note that Keamy is wearing a flashy watch, a watch that some Korean gentleman we know was taking to Los Angeles to deliver to an associate of Mr Paik’s. Sayid discovers Jin in a walk in fridge. Why is Jin tied up? Well, to speculate, Jin had trouble getting cash through customs at the airport. If they kept the cash at the airport, maybe Keamy was expecting a watch and the cash, maybe to receive for Widmore. But Jin shows up with no cash. Knucklehead Keamy figures Jin stole it, Jin can’t explain in English what happened, and Jin is tied up.
Not a shocker. To get the money back and avoid a big hassle, all Jin has to do is fill out some paperwork. But much like me and the census, Jin has no time to such paperwork nonsense. It would be nice if Sun knew some English, but this version of Sun apparently does not. So, I suppose she never had that affair with Jae Lee, her English tutor in Korea. Jin missed his meeting at the restaurant and has no idea what the cash he was asked to deliver was for. He is still a loyal employee, doing whatever Sun’s father, Mr. Paik, tells him. While they check into a hotel, we learn that Jin and Sun ask for separate rooms because they are not married. Was this supposed to be a Gotcha moment, or at least interesting. Yawn. MIB has an errand to run, and asks Sayid to keep an eye on camp while he is gone. Sayid doesn’t seem to understand Yes, boss, or Right away, boss, but responds that he doesn’t feel anything. I know exactly how Sayid feels as this episode unfolds. He doesn’t feel anger, happiness, pain. OK, I take that not feeling part of me back. I sure do feel some of those. Specifically anger and pain. I don’t feel happiness until bullets start flying in the restaurant. MIB: Maybe it’s best, to get through what is coming. I muster some hope that many of the main characters are going to die soon. Alas, not soon enough. As Jin is packing up, Sawyer tries to talk him out of it, mentioning his deal with Widmore. Jin is more interested in finding his wife, since he hasn’t seen her since Season 4, and he has needs. Hell, it’s been 3 years in Dharma a few other random weeks, and Sawyer doesn’t have his magazines with him. Darts come flying out, as Widmorites attack, and we have a scene reminiscent of one of many, many purges on the show. Instead of killing some of these acolytes, which would be smart, Widmorites take only Jin.

Frank and Miles are playing the worst strip poker game in history on the beach. Is there any other reason for poker cards? I can’t think of another game you can play with poker cards. Ben: now what? So, the man who said that he always has a plan, doesn’t have any plan. What the fock did they do to Ben’s character? Ben is worthless and rather lobotomized. What, you turned a ruthless cavalier into comedy relief? Yuck. Ilana says that Richard is coming back. I have a feeling that men’s pink sweater vest turtlenecks are coming back before Richard. But what do I know? Ben is skeptical as Miles speaks about Hurley chasing bacon grease throughout the jungle. Truth be told, if Hurley can smell about 150 years into the past, he could pick up the scent of Richard covered in roasted boar grease and failure. Ilana says they need to wait; Sun throws down the gauntlet, otherwise better known as a mango and a knife, and walks away without speaking. Thank God for the not speaking part. It’s bad enough she is annoying when speaking English; it will be suicide inducing to hear her jabbering in Korean and subtitles how much she needs to find Jin. Sun makes her way back to her old garden from 3 years ago, and decides to harvest some weeds in a very angry way. Jack goes to talk to her. He mentions that didn’t it feel like 100 years ago something, something. Look, if you don’t want to discuss loops, then make the characters stop dropping hints about it. Jack starts a grandiose speech about candidates and visiting Jacob’s lighthouse and mirrors and names and Sun rightfully interrupts and explains that she just doesn’t give a fock. She doesn’t care about their purpose or their destiny, she just wants to be left alone. Jin knocks on Sun’s hotel room. Sun doesn’t understand American custom and assumes that no one will be at the restaurant at 11: 30 so Jin can deliver the watch and empty box where the money should have been. She has never heard of the late night drive thru window. Jin accuses Sun of being in America for a shopping trip. Hmm, that 25 grand would come in handy for something like that. Sun explains that no one could possibly be watching them, especially on the plane, and starts a strip tease. Do you want me to button it? If it’s your mouth, yes, yes, a hundred times yes. Sun carries a certain arrogance with her in this time line, as if she is proud to be daddy’s rich little girl. Hey, what could possibly go wrong? You work for my father, and he is an important man. As Sun continues to destroy her sorry excuse for a garden and manages to cut herself, MIB pops out. MIB: I found your husband, as I promised you. You have to hand it to masquerading Locke, he kept his word. MIB offers to take Sun to Jin. Bingo. Sun has gotten what she wanted. Or not. NOW, Sun decides that she doesn’t believe someone. Sun: you killed people at the Temple. Pshaw. Sun didn’t even know anybody at the Temple, so what’s the bloody difference? MIB, noticeably without a knife hole in his shirt, “Those people were confused, they were lied to, I didn’t want to hurt them, they could have chosen to come with me, I would never ask you to do something against your will. A pretty compelling argument actually. Sun decides that she’s had about enough of the truth, and runs away. MIB for whatever reason does not turn into the faster mode of transportation as Smoke Monster, and chases Sun on foot. Sun, wait.

MIB is in hot pursuit. He is craving a Diablo sandwich and a Dr Pepper. And you better make is fast, cause he is in a God-dammed hurry. Sun makes the classic blunder of running and turns to look over her shoulder at her pursuer. Unfortunately for her, Sun trips over the “V” logo and runs face first into a rather thick tree branch. Whoo Hoo. Nice. Also, ABC just decided that they were going to cover over part of the screen at all times to promote the stupid V show, which was particularly offensive when Sun is writing something down at the end of the episode, and you can’t freaking see it. A pox on those who made this decision. Jin and Sun wake up in bed together. Sun gets the notion of running away together since she has some money socked away. In the island time line, Sun originally was going to run away by herself. Jin is less than impressed with the plan, and says as much. Sun has something to tell Jin, when a knock on the door interrupts the conversation. Left unsaid was that Sun is pregnant, but I doubt there is much of a guarantee that it’s Jin’s baby. While Jin hides, Sun takes a really long look at a mirror and seems troubled by what she sees. Yeah, a friggin’ monster. We get it, all the characters look in a mirror in the LAX timeline. You don’t have to be quite so obvious. Martin Keamy is at the door, back from the dead, and as quirky as ever. He’s a friend of Sun’s father so he simply invites himself in. Again, we see no evidence that Sun understands any English. It’s bit of a room invasion, if you will. Back on the island, Ben finds the semi conscious Sun, and there is no evidence that she can speak English any more, a mirror of the other timelne. MIB returns to his camp, and is somewhat concerned that his followers were attacked. It was fairly pronounced that there was a significant amount of white smoke wafting just over the bodies. Sure, it could have simply been the result of smoldering camp fires. Or something more significant. The first person MIB goes to is Sayid. Sayid is no help, as he is just as aware of what happened as he is whether he just took a dump in his pants. He feels nothing, you know. It may be slowly dawning on MIB that he may need to poke Sayid a few times a day with a stick so he doesn’t get bed sores. Jin is being held prisoner in Room 23, the brain washing room on Hydra island that Kate and Sawyer and Alex rescued Karl from back in Season 3. Looking for a way out, Jin turns off the lights. This is not Jin’s finest hour in using his wits. Yeah, that’s going to work, turning off the lights. He gets a blast of brainwashing projection, in between images. Think about your life. We are the cause of our own suffering. Everything changes. The lights come back on and the milquetoast Zoe steps out into the room. Why is this annoying person on my TV screen. Zoe stinks and I don’t like her. She explains that Dharma was doing experiments on subliminal messages in here. Fine, but when Karl was strapped down in this room, A Clockwork Orange style, there were plenty of Jacob messages being broadcast. So the Others were doing their share of brainwashing too. Include this in mysteries I didn’t care about and answers that waste our time. We already knew enough about Room 23. Really, we did. Zoe accuses Jin of knowing all about Dharma before tasering him trying to leave. She shows him some old grid maps that included identifying marks of electro magnetic pockets of energy and Jin’s signature. Jin certainly does not deny any of this. Jin was using grid maps to search for other Losties for a while in 1974-1977, and he was a very mobile part of LaFleur’s security team. Why Jin was busy with identifying the negatively charged matter pockets, I’m not sure. Jin is granted an audience with Charles Widmore. MIB gives Sayid a mission to go to Hydra island, armed. Without skipping a beat, MIB addresses a forlorn Courtney Love. What’s wrong Claire? C: you told Jin that his name is on the cave wall and need to take him off the island. Is my name on the wall? MIB answers No. However, I have to wonder since #313 is Littleton, and could very well be Claire, though the name is crossed off. Claire is feeling neglected and insecure, a bit like Karen from Goodfellas. MIB reassures her that he needs her, there is plenty of room on the plane. Claire is concerned that her son Aaron, who has the shape of a lollipop, because his head is enormous, won’t know who she is. Well, considering he has been cared for by Claire, Kate, Grandma Littleton, and possibly Claire again, I can’t imagine why he would think he is living in a lesbian cult. Is Kate on the wall? Psst, yes, she is. #51. MIB stumbles over his response. No, er, not anymore. Well, she isn’t crossed out at the Lighthouse. We never saw her name at the cave at all. MIB needs her, she can help him recruit the 3 other candidates from Jacob’s followers, Jack Hurley and Sun. After that, whatever happens, happens. MIB is using the same Faraday phrase that was all the rage last season. Repetition. Sawyer questions why MIB can’t turn into smoke and float to the other island. MIB: Don’t you think if I could, I would? Hold on, this makes no sense. MIB has been established as a guy that can be in two places at once, and has traveled back and forth between islands by boat. But he can’t cross the ocean in smoke form? Really? So, then how does he appear to Jack as Christian in the hospital in the flashfowards? How does he appear as Christian to Michael on the freighter? This does not make sense. The actual ghosts of these people are appearing around the world? How did he get over to Hydra to purge Ajira without floating? Sawyer: yeah, that would be ridiculous. Much the same as the writing. OK, so we have just established that Smokie can’t travel over water…well, sometimes he can, but let’s ignore that. This is why I pull hair out of my head. MIB tries to pretend he is doing a noble thing and getting one of our people back. Dammit. MIB is now acting as whiny as Jacob.

Sun gives the watch to Keamy. It is now established that Jin is Sun’s bodyguard in this timeline. I don’t know if that is any better than working as Mr Paik’s special assistant. I don’t know if that is any better than weighing polar bear sh!!t on Hydra island. Keamy’s henchman Omar puts in another LOST appearance, and both chuckleheads spot 2 wine glasses near the bed. While it’s true that this is an obvious plot device in many TV shows and movies in revealing that more than one person is in the room, if Sun was let’s say a drunkard that wants multiple glasses around his place so that no matter where he wanders off to, say the toiler or fridge or back to the toilet, there is always a drink awaiting my return wherever I go. I have about 18 drinks in my house at any given time, not including drinks spilled on the floor, which require a straw instead. And I haven’t had a guest over in a decade. FACE. They quickly find Jin hiding in the bathroom. It would have been a much more civilized hiding spot if there was a drink waiting for Jin. “Where iz za money, Lebowski?” Keamy shows an appreciation for great cinema with an observation that this is a friggin’ Godzilla movie. And he means the Matthew Broderick sh!!tstorm. Keamy wants to bring in translator Mikhail, Danny’s friend. Don’t let the reference to Danny pass you by. Danny was the Other that was pounding the crap out of Sawyer at the polar bear cages. His wife Colleen was shot and killed by Sun on Desmond’s sailboat at the start of Season 3. Anyway, Mikhail speaks 9 languages, which is pretty impressive. He also has two peepers, which is off putting. He translates to Keamy about the money being held up at customs. The plan is for Sun to go to the bank with Mikhail, and Jin to go to the restaurant with everybody else. They could have decided to go to customs and fill out the paperwork, but that is too boring. Well, more boring that this episode at least. Jin shows a sudden impulsive side, in other words a stupid side. J: Don’t tell Mr Paik about us. Yeah, because that isn’t going to lead to blackmail, dummy. Keamy is now doing a borderline Christopher Walken impression. Don’t worry. You’re secret is safe with me. Given how Keamy is an uncaring thug, not willing to give Sayid’s brother a break, what are the odds that Keamy is going to be tightlipped for Jin? Pffft. Ricky Martin asked Keamy not the spill the beans on his sexual orientation, but we all knew he was a princess about 10 years ago, so that didn’t work out too well either. Ilana is giving Ben a hard time about finding Sun in the jungle. Ben protests his innocence. Miss Sassy Pants invited Ben to be part of the group. Now, she is casting aspersions on her buddy. Just for disrespecting Ben like that, I want her to be the next one that dies. What has become of our used-to-be favorite maniac Ben? He is now arguably the most useless character on either island, with the possible exception of Skull Baby, Zack, and Emma. Oh, I take that back. I would never insult Skull Baby like that. Skull Baby is the bee’s knees, the cat’s pajamas, and the snake’s hip. Jack reasons that she hit her head, forgot how to talk English, it’s not unusual but temporary, and Sun will be OK. This is as convincing as Harvey Keitel’s You’re gonna be OK speech from Reservoir Dogs, just before somebody lost an ear and got doused in gasoline. Miss Gloomy Gus breaks into some kind of face contortion that is part Jack O’Lantern grin, part grimace. And by grimace, I mean that stupid fat purple puppet for some God forsaken fast foot place. I originally meant fast food, but somehow foot seemed more of a realistic food critique. Richard is back. I have to give the blithering idiot some credit. He has done the nearly impossible on LOST island. Put together a couple of facts to think up a plan of action. I mean, we could watch the Losties eat mangos for the next 6 episodes and have the series end….ah…on second thought, I pray that nobody important read that, especially a LOST writer, and a light bulb just popped up over his/her head. MIB arrives by boat at the Hydra, where the pylons are up and running. It doesn’t seem realistic that they brought enough to surround the entire island, but there must have been enough awkward, crappy looking props to surround the plane (just past the trees at the edge of the beach), the brainwashing barrack, and other strategic locations. I don’t see how it would be possible to surround the submarine. I don’t know how a slight ocean breeze doesn’t knock over a row. Some shots are fired at MIB, and unlike the fate suffered by Bram and his goons at the statue foot at the start of this season, MIB does not turn into Smoke upon being provoked. MIB declares that he comes in peace. Widmore comes out to have a chat. Each character goes through a “Do you know who I am?” self indulgent pat on the back. CW: Everything I know is myth, ghost stories, and jungle noises in the night. MIB thinks Charles knows more than he lets on, using the pylons as an example. Widmore denies taking Jin. Is kidnapping a candidate against the rules? And isn’t Widmore taking an awfully large gamble that Jin is the right Kwon to begin with? If Sun is the right person, then MIB could very well be able to gather all the right candidates anyway. Shouldn’t Widmore’s group have taken Jin and maybe Kate or Sawyer? Just to be sure. If you are going to recruit, you might as well grab as many as you can. No, Widmore has more mysterious motives than he is letting on. He is much more concerned with the island and it’s energy than MIB’s escape, I think. He can claim differently, the proof will be in the pudding. MIB throws Widmore’s own words, spoken to John Locke, right at him. “A wise man once said that a war was coming to this island. Well, consider it broughtened.” They have trouble establishing a time for their cheerleading competition, but promise to post at each other’s Facebook page. Richard hatches his plan. Since MIB is headed to the Hydra island, and that is where the Ajira plane is, and MIB wants to leave the island, they need to destroy the plane. Sigh.
From 6.8 Recon
…and gives him hope of flying off the island. Sawyer never stops to think how much open land they would need to taxi a plane, get rolling, and actually take off. There is no way Frank is going to get the Ajira plane off the ground. No way. Plus, when they landed, a branch went through the windshield and shish kabobbed the co-pilot to death. I don’t think there is a Plane Windshield hatch on the island, so that plane is just a bigger waste of space than Zach.
Sun is less than pleased by the thought of destroying the only thing that can get them off the island. Unless you consider the sub, a raft, rebuilding the Black Rock, the outrigger canoe, and the various boats the Others have/had, including Desmond’s sailboat. Oh, and the frozen donkey wheel. But there is no way off the island other than that. Sun goes on a tirade that no one understands, a very smart use of everybody’s time. She starts out by calling Richard an idiot, which was either very perceptive, very ironic, or both. She then calls him insane. I came back here to save my husband and bring him home, not save the world. Well, now we know for sure, she is an idiot too. What an amazing micro view of the situation. Me. Me. Me. Never mind that neither you nor your husband will exist if nobody saves the world. It’s no wonder Sun can not speak English anymore. When Locke lost his faith, he lost the use of his legs (when he and Boone found Yemi’s plane) or lost his voice (when the Swan hatch blew up). While Locke was able to fight through his faith crisis, Sun has shown zero, absolutely none, zip, nada faith in the island or any high concepts that are happening all around her. She is an agnostic. All she knows is what she sees and only what is important to her. Sun: You need me, she said I’m important, I’m not going anywhere.” I don’t know why they kept her around for 6 seasons, but Sun has been useless since she saved Shannon’s life with eucalyptus paste in Season 1. During Sun’s meltdown, Richard looks at Jack. Jack looks back and shrugs. Ah, there’s our Jack. The same priceless DUNNO look on his face when they reach Jughead in Season 5 and Richard asks Jack What’s next. I dunno. Duh. You just know he wants to stick a finger up his nose. Miles: "Fifty bucks the Jack kid picks his nose". Hurley: “Fifty bucks more says he eats it...Man that kid'll eat anything." Well, they should have said it. At the bank, Sun has run into a problem and run out of money. Her super secret account was closed by her father and drained of all funds. Sun doesn’t understand why. Even Mikhail rolls his two eyes at that one. Omar is a bit rough is putting Jin in the walk in fridge in the restaurant. I believe the same head wound Jin had in the brainwashing room on Hydra island was the same wound he just got from selling hello to a door with his skull. Keamy reprimands him before sending him on an errand to pick up Sayid. Keamy proceeds to tape up Jin and go on a long rambling speech, given to someone who doesn’t understand English. Keamy: Just in case you forgot what’s about to happen on the island, can’t have you freaking out.” Say what? I rewound, and rewound, and rewound. This was dialogue that looked spliced in at the “island” part, and consider that sentence. Here is Keamy talking about strapping Jin in because of what’s going to happen on the island. Freighter exploding, perhaps, that threw Jin into the water? It’s as if Keamy knows stuff, super secret stuff. Or the two timelines are bleeding together, and this was some kind of merging point. But this is definitely 2004, not the current 2007 that the Losties and various other groups are a part of. Very, very odd. Keamy explains that he was the one that turned in Jin and Sun to Mr Paik about the affair and the 25 grand that is missing was a reward for Keamy. Jin broke the cardinal rule of “hands off the boss’s daughter. To be fair, Keamy is making the clichéd mistake of the bad guy explaining the plot to the audience just before getting killed. Keamy: Some people just aren’t meant to be together. Keamy is a rather intelligent moron. Which characters on this show have been able to hold onto their relationship in both time lines? Maybe Rose and Bernard? We don’t know about Desmond and Penny. Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? Widmore is cranky at Zoe about Jin’s abduction. That wasn’t supposed to happen for days. Zoe: maybe you should have put a mercenary in charge rather than a geophysicist. Shades of the freighter arrival, when Naomi was the mercenary in charge of a substance abuse pilot, a physicist, an archeologist, and a guy that can speak to the dead. Widmore breaks out the Sawyer line “What’s done is done” yet another repetition in dialogue this season. The package is to be taken to the infirmary, a pretty good clue that it’s a person since last I checked luggage doesn’t need Valtrex. Widmore gives Sun’s camera from her luggage to Jin so he can see some baby pictures of her daughter. Her daughter looks like a Tribble from Star Trek fame. What’s with this show and ugly children? Jin gets emotional at seeing his ugly daughter for the first time. Is ugly too harsh of a word? How about Jin gets emotional thinking about the plastic surgery bills he will have to pay in the future. That’s more subtle I think. Widmore knows that Jin wants to be reunited with his wife and child, but that would be short lived if that thing masquerading as John Locke were able to leave the island. This is exactly the speech that Jack or Richard needed to give to Sun on the other island to keep her in line. Terse and unflappably logical. I’m starting to really warm up to this Widmore guy. W: Everybody would simply cease to be. Interesting choice of words. Not “die” but “cease to be”. Almost like saying you can die in one time line, but cease to be in many timelines. Maybe. As we’ve speculated in the past, especially around the time Sayid shot Ben in the heart, and the wound in the next episode was two feet away in another part of his chest. The island is an intersection of timelines, a merging, a very powerful point the many worlds that exist. The actions here affect many lives and many versions of the same lives. Maybe I’m just having another Mr Drinky McDrinkalot moment. Loops still happen, I’m almost sure. Carrying on. Widmore has to make sure that this doesn’t happen and wants to show Jin his package. I hate to break the news to Widmore, but some people just aren’t meant to be together.

Jin is listening to the apparently fast forward scene of Sayid and Keamy’s eggciting restaurant confrontation. Jin’s kicking on the door brings Sayid to his apparent aide. Sayid gives a “Who are you?” as I’m trying to figure out if he is looking much more dazed and confused now that he did a couple of episodes ago when he found Jin at our first view of this scene, but I’m too lazy to find to go find it right now. Sayid looks like he dipped into whatever stash of hash Frank’s character has been bringing to the set. S: I don’t know why you are here, and I don’t care. This mimics the speech Sayid gave to MIB earlier in the episode of how he doesn’t feel anything anymore. Sayid manages to find some humanity, and gives Jin a box cutter to cut himself out with, and even wished him good luck. Mikhail and Sun are late to arrive at the restaurant purge. Keamy is still alive, and as Mikhail tends to him, Keamy calls him an idiot and says looks behind you. Yet another cardinal mistake made by a character, yet another scene of somebody being called idiot in this episode, other than by me. I think it’s been three times already by other people. Jin: put the gun down, or I’ll kill you. Jin simply is not capable of pulling the trigger in either time line. Sure, he is very capable of martial arts, but doesn’t have the package to kill. Mikhail correctly reasons that Jin could not have killed Keamy and his men or he would have shot Mikhail by now, so a struggle ensues and several bullets are sprayed around the kitchen. That poor cleaning crew. This fight didn’t last as long as the first Jin and Mikhail fight in the jungle during the Naomi rescue. Mikhail grabs a knife, which is a bad thing to bring to a gun fight, and Jin finally manages to pull the trigger. A nice touch in putting one in Mikhail’s eye. The question will be, is Mikhail really dead? Or will he heal and magically show up at Halloween and attack Jin. Maybe kill Charlie in the process. And a few naked co-ed girls. Then chase Jamie Lee Curtis who is having a hard time running with her perpetual diarrhea. Just before the gun fight, Jin ordered Sun to move out of the way. So, of course, Sun moved directly into the line of fire. Sun has been shot in the gut, and her hands are blood soaked. Sun: I’m pregnant. Worst home pregnancy test ever. Jin picks her up. We are left to speculate. In the regular timeline, Jin is incapable of getting Sun pregnant due to shooting blanks. This is resolved on the island, as Juliet tells us the island turns sperm into super sperm. So, in LAX, is Jin capable to knocking up Sun? I really don’t care, but thought I should point this out. Sun is sitting on a rather angry beach with angry surf and surly sand. Remember how calm and beautiful the beach was during Season 1? Jack comes by with a Sharpie and a notebook. Then, we get to hear quite possibly the worst speech given in the history of ever. Jack: Guess what I found in the garden? One. Stubborn. Tomato. I guess someone forgot to tell him he was supposed to die. Seriously, this is a cavalcade of stupidity. If I ever see a neighbor plant any tomatoes around here, I will burn them to the ground and salt the earth. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been so disgusted by a vegetable in my life. Yes, I’m talking about Jack. I drink half a glass of V8 juice every morning. I can’t do it anymore. I looked at the bottle, the bottle looked back at me, and I couldn’t face it anymore. I was just so embarrassed for the actor playing Jack having to say One Stubborn Tomato. He could have said “I feel like a fried egg!!” and it would have possibly less idiotic. I would rather be chased through a labyrinth by AIDS patients with weeping sores than listen to Jack say anything, including “Yep”, “Nope”, and “Gurgle” as he is being choked by the string that attaches one of his mittens to his other mitten. We have officially hit rock bottom of LOST. It can’t get any worse, can it? The dialogue is being written by 5 year olds. Jack: It’s not the first time somebody told me to leave them alone. Yeah, Yah think? Like your ex-wife, dead father, your untalented son in LAX, Kate, Hurley in the last episode when he told you to beat it. Do I need to continue the list? Sun explains in writing that Locke claimed to have Jin, but she didn’t trust him. You’ve been chasing Jin for years, but turn down a chance to reunite, you dumb tomato. Jack: Do you trust me? Sure we do Jack. Because your decision to move to the caves lasted a couple of episodes. The decision to willingly walk into Michael’s trap with the Others was brilliant. How many times did you turn over guns to the Others. How about exiting the underwater Hydra hatch and almost drowning? Calling the freighter despite Locke’s and Ben’s warnings? Brilliant!!! Leaving the island with the Oceanic 6? Winner!! Blowing up the hydrogen bomb? Who knows? Jack has done nothing right. EVER. Sun: Yes. Jack holds out his hand, which is noticeably covered in sand. Not only would I not put Jack in charge of the island and in charge of keeping MIB here, but I wouldn’t trust him to guard a litter box, which he has just shown he is incapable of doing. The emperor wears no clothes, mother fockers. Somebody has to listen to me. ARRRRRRRGHGGHGHGHGH@#^@^^Y^ U6tpisodpfg *&(**#^J…I just spent an uncomfortable moment typing with my face, but I seemed to have calmed down somewhat. Jack-ass: Come with me, I’ll help you find Jin. Jack gives Sun the MIB speech from Season 5, promising the same exact thing. J: I’ll get you both on the plane, get you as far away from this island as you can get, I promise. Notice that Jack didn’t say he was coming with them. You, You, You. Not we. Sun takes Jack’s poo hand, something that MIB failed as he tried to get Kate, Sawyer, and other folks to shake his hand at various times. Too much hand shaking, not enough Purell. At MIB’s camp, Sawyer makes embarrassingly bad small talk with Kate. Sawyer is concerned about how his plans are being undermined, but thinks it will all be over soon. Sure it will. A couple more episode about tomatoes and sunflowers and it will be all over. Sawyer seems to think Widmore will get the drop on MIB. Um, Sawyer does realize that he who looks like Locke is the Smoke Monster. Who the hell do you think will win in a battle? I got my money on Smokie. Well, here comes MIB, so guess who’s screwed? MIB explains they denied having Jin, doesn’t like secrets, and wanted to see what they were protecting. Sayid surfaces at the Hydra pier. I am left to wonder if Sayid needs to even breathe at this point. Zoe and some Widmore boob are dragging a tranquilized person along the boardwalk. Drugs are not uncommon for a submarine trip to the island. Or if you are a pilot. It’s Desmond.
From 6.8 Recon
Since Widmore was able to return to the island, and was most likely aware of the Ajira disappearance and the gathering of the candidates to return, he may very well have abducted somebody to help the submarine gain access to the island. The island always gets you. Perhaps Desmond?
The island is not done with Desmond, as Eloise Hawking predicted at the Lamp post hatch under the church in Los Angeles. Desmond is rather surprised to see Sayid. Then again, I bet Desmond right now would have been surprised to see a lily pad. When we last left him, he was in the hospital after being attacked by Ben on the pier by his boat. His mother and father, Eloise Hawking and Charles Widmore, were seen talking outside Desmond’s hospital. Sure does seem that Charles has kidnapped Desmond. As Daniel Faraday said, Desmond is extraordinary special and the rules don’t apply to him. He is a game changer who has been course corrected and manipulated all his life, and it looks like we will be finding out why fairly soon. Maybe. Stupid writers.